Lawsuits and Costs

Let’s Get Litigious… Again

Anyone else get the feeling that the reason they converted the Old City Hall to a Provincial Court House was to cut down on travel time? Coming soon, to a judge near you, is a suit brought by the City against the Board of Health to prevent them from constructing a new Health Unit headquarters and unilaterally saddling Guelph with the $10 million cheque.

"Guelph City Council has agreed it will urge the Counties of Dufferin and Wellington to not support the Board of Health in proceeding with direct ownership of property," said Mayor Karen Farbridge in a press release. "We will be requesting the counties participate, along with the City, in meetings with the Ministry of Health and Long Term Care to discuss alternatives that would not jeopardize Provincial participation in funding accommodation costs or add to the City's debt."

The Province is the key to all this. Basically, about $22 million is needed to build new facilities for the Wellington-Dufferin-Guelph Health Unit both here and in Orangeville. According to the current budget structure for the WDGHU, 75 per cent of the funding comes from the Government of Ontario and 25 per cent from the municipalities. But for some reason, the Province isn’t going to foot their share of the bill on this one, and is sticking the whole cheque with Guelph and Orangeville. Naturally, this was not received well on the local level.

“While the City of Guelph acknowledges a new location is needed, it hopes an injunction will afford the chance to determine its legal obligations to fund these types of projects,” said the formal statement in the press release. “The City is committed to exploring alternatives, and remains hopeful an alternative can be found.”

Museum for Sale?

Why do construction cost always overrun? No time to worry about that now, because costs for the construction of turning the Loretto Convent into the new Civic Museum have overrun and the City needs a way to pay for it. Last week, a potential solution presented itself: sell the current Civic Museum building. In a report, City Staff gave the okay to investigate what would be involved in selling the 160-year-old limestone building, which could fetch between $500,000 and $700,000 on the market. Members of the Community and Social Services Committee also asked to see options for leasing, but the fact of the matter is that the City needs money, or the new Museum might not be completed this year as planned. “It’s best to complete the Loretto project and get it done right rather than have two assets to pay for,” said Ann Pappert, executive director of community and social services.

The Tax Burden on Council

Two nights of debating till midnight, a string of confused or misunderstood numbers, a bunch of new hires, a revolt over transit funding, raiding reserves to keep taxes down, and still ending up with a 3.14 per cent increase, it seems that everyone agrees on one thing: the way the City of Guelph does its budget just isn’t working.

The Guelph Tribune reached out to all 13 members of Guelph City Council to get their opinion on improving the budget process for next year. Considering that nearly half of council voted against the 2011, opinions were not in short supply.

“I recall doing zero-based budgeting when I was first elected,” wrote Gloria Kovach. Zero-based budgeting requires city departments to account for every dollar spent by making them start their budget process at zero rather than basing it on spending from the year before. “Unfortunately, that opportunity, even modified, is not available for council or staff. At some point when the budget is only given to council at a high level, without detailed explanations, it is impossible for council to understand the details needed for responsible budgeting.”

Karl Wettstein was a little more pragmatic saying that this year was a unique case because the process got started so late this year due to the election and that the City was still suffering from the residual impact of the recession. “I expect we will have a budget debrief session to assess where we can make improvements, get back to earlier time lines and generally continue to improve our budget process,” Wettstein said.

You can read the full story for yourself here: http://www.guelphtribune.ca/news/article/231278

They Cost How Much?

Partisan back and forth is nothing new, especially with the possibility of an election (constantly) in the air, but last week Liberal MP Frank Valeriote and Federal Conservative candidate Marty Burke disagreed on the math. The math in question is the cost of Canada’s new fleet of 65 F-35 fighter, the government originally said the cheque for the planes would come in at $16 billion, but Parliamentary budget officer Kevin Page estimated the entire package will cost taxpayers $22.6 billion over 20 years. If the planes are in service for 30 years, that price tag could jump to nearly $30 billion. Valeriote accused the Tories of hiding the true cost, but Burke says they were merely talking about two different timelines for the life of the planes. But there’s one thing both men agree on, and that is that Canada really does need new fighter planes. It’s ironic that it takes war planes to bring us together.

Hans, James and Apps

Farewell Hans

After a recent city council meeting that saw him being taken away to the hospital by ambulance after unexpectedly collapsing, the City of Guelph’s Chief Administrative Officer announced last week that he’s going to leave his position a little earlier than expected. “Mr. Loewig shared his plans at a closed meeting of City Council last night and offered to stay on as the City's Chief Administrator until the end of 2011, committing to help Council with its recruitment of a new CAO and ensure a smooth transition,” said a City press release last Tuesday. “He is stepping down from the City's top job for personal reasons.”

Loewig first took the position in 2007 when he was acting as interim CAO. He was later confirmed as the City’s permanent CAO, being hired on a four-year contract in 2008. Loweig’s nearly four decades of experience in the municipal sector includes serving as CAO of the City of Brantford from 1999 till 2004. The press release credited Loewig for helping to solidify Guelph’s economic strength during his tenure by helping to secure Federal and Provincial stimulus money and by pushing ahead with the development of the Hanlon Creek Business Park lands.

But February’s health issue was the second time in two years that Loewig took time off for personal reasons, so I guess the time was right to “focus on his own well-being and his family,” as Mark Amorosi, executive director of human resources and legal services said to the Guelph Mercury last week.

"This decision was a difficult one for me because I continue to be passionate about the important work we do on behalf of this community," said Loewig in the press release. "The years I've spent as Guelph's CAO have been rich with positive challenges and very rewarding. I have been very fortunate to have worked with so many committed and capable people in the organization."

The Mayor also offered words of praise for the outgoing CAO. "The legacy Mr. Loewig leaves is one of exemplary leadership, integrity, and a roll-up-your-sleeves work ethic that has served our community extremely well over the past four years,” said Karen Farbridge. “I'd like to thank Mr. Loewig for everything he's done for our community, and wish him the absolute best."

The City will begin the hiring process for the new CAO in the next couple of months.

James Gordon Wants to Be NDP

After years of being the singing voice for progressive issues in the City of Guelph, singer/songwriter James Gordon now wants to be its actual voice at Queens Park. According to the Guelph Mercury last week, Gordon is one of two high-profile candidates vying for the NDP nomination for this fall's Provincial Election, the other is Susan Wheeler, writer, educator and advocate for the disabled. According to NDP Federal candidate Bobbi Stewart, the local Provincial New Democrats are expecting to have their nomination meeting sometime for the end of April. Local PC's are also looking for a candidate and the Green Party says that they'll begin their search sometime this week. Current MPP and Liberal Party candidate Liz Sandals will be running again for a third term.

Playing Telephone

That annoying phone call you’re getting a dinner time? It just might be the City of Guelph. Starting this past week, phones are ringing in hundreds of Guelph households as the City surveys residents on their priorities and aspirations for their community over the next four years. So for those of you either too jaded or too lazy to write letters, make phone calls, go to public meetings, or even vote, this is your time to shine. (But you'll probably hang up before you even learn what the call is about.)

Environics Research Group will conduct the survey which will be a 10-minute survey conducted in English and three other languages among a representative sample of 600 residents aged 18 and older. The sample will yield an overall margin of error of +/- 4.0 percentage points, 19 times out of 20. Questions on age, gender, education, income, ethnicity, and ward will help ensure the demographics of the sample mirror Guelph's population as a whole, according to a city press release.

In other telephone-related news, Grand River County now has its own iPhone app that will enable people to take Grand River with them no matter where they go. The free app, available through Apple iTunes App Store, is Grand River Country’s new trip planning companion for the iPhone described as an easy-to-use, and featuring the best of attractions, dining, accommodation, festivals and recreation found throughout the Grand River watershed. “I am excited to pass this one-of-a-kind benefit on to our tourism partners,” says Sue Trerise, Senior Business Development Specialist-Tourism for Guelph Tourism Services. “We are working hard to keep up with the changing technologies available to the tourism sector.”

So yes kids, Guelph, there’s an app for that.

Anger Over Water and the Arts

The Wonders of Water Anger

It almost slipped by them, but the Wellington Water Watchers mobilized quickly and used Facebook to get public reaction and outrage to the possible approval of a 10-year contract extension for Nestle Waters in Aberfoyle. The new contract could be approved by the Province of Ontario as early as March 5th, and if allowed would permit Nestle to take 3.6 million litres of water per day from the Grand River watershed.

“This is far too long and way too much,” states Mike Nagy, former Green Party candidate and board member for WWW. “In fact, there are many aspects of this proposed Nestlé-Ministry of Environment agreement that should raise red flags for all Guelph-area citizens who care about water issues.”

And care they do. As soon as WWW changed the name of their Facebook group to “Oppose Nestle Waters Canada's ‘Permit to take Water’ Renewal Bid!” a tidal of wave of member reaction was posted to the site. “The water Nestle pays $5,000 for in Aberfoyle would cost $5 million in New Jersey,” said former Mayoral candidate and local provocateur Ray Mitchell. “Who is getting paid off, the Provincial gov't. or Guelph City Hall?” Michael Wright, another poster on the site, was even more curt. “Our water is not for sale - F*ck off Nestle.”

Emotions concerning Guelph’s water and the private corporations that want access to it have always been high. In 2007, Wellington Water Watchers was formed to combat Nestle’s previous contract renewal for five years at 3.6 million litres per day. After nearly a year of back and forth, the Ministry of the Environment followed direction from Guelph City Council and renewed the contract for only two years, but the litre per diem mark remained at 3.6 million.

“At the very most, the maximum volume of water allowed in any new Nestlé agreement should be no more than the maximum taken in 2010, which was 1.6 million litres per day,” Nagy says. “And then it should be reduced by at least 1.56 percent per year after that, consistent with Ontario’s initiatives on sustainable water use.”

The period for public comment about the renewal closes today, and a decision could be made about the renewal as early as March 5th. To learn more about WWW’s objections to the permit and find out how you can help their cause, go to http://www.wellingtonwaterwatchers.ca

…Speaking of Negative Reactions

Last Tuesday was the public’s chance for input into the 2011 operating and capital budgets, and wouldn’t you know it, a lot of that reaction was of the negative variety towards transit’s service cuts and fee hike. The sum and total of the (stated) public reaction can be found on my blog at http://guelphpolitico.blogspot.com/, but the point is, it wasn’t all about transit.

Yes Virgina, the people of Guelph had other things on their minds about their city and how their local government spends money. For instance, Anastasia Ziprick spoke to council on behalf of several major arts festivals including the Guelph Jazz Festival, the Guelph Contemporary Dance Festival and Hillside, remarking about how rental fees on the River Run Centre need to be lowered. Ziprick said that it’s hard to deal with mounting expenses and if fees at the River Run’s Co-operators Hall aren’t reduced, then the Jazz Festival may have to relocate.

Sandy Ferguson-Escott spoke next on behalf of the Guelph-Non Profit Housing Committee. She was looking for tax relief on the GNPHC’s development on Paisley Road. The problem for GNPHC is that they got a bad deal when the project was developed in 2005, which prevents them from seeking additional revenue by transferring it over from one of their other eight sites. Without the tax relief, Ferguson-Escott said, there won’t be enough money to pay for the bills, and the project will be effectively bankrupt.

On another subject, Konnie Peet, Executive Director of the Guelph Community Health Centre on behalf of the Wellington-Guelph Drug Strategy Committee, asked for $30,000 in new funding from the City and the County of Wellington in order to hire a co-ordinator and help fund overhead costs. This money would be an annual budget line item to help the WGDDSC with its outreach, treatment, harm reduction and prevention programs.

Before the end of the night, Guelph Chamber of Commerce President Lloyd Longfield took the floor to state his concerns about the City’s hiring of 87 Full-Time Equivalent positions saying that most businesses are continuing to act with an abundance of caution in these early stages of economic recovery. He also added that as much as he wants the City to help foster industrial and commercial development, he also wanted them to keep in mind residential growth, as many of the businesses he works with are telling him that they’re looking outside the city limits for skilled, and professional workers.

Apples and Oranges

The budget deliberations have sparked a lot of emotion across the board. On the one hand there are increased parking rates and bus fares that have people incensed, and on the other hand there’s the proposed 5.67 per cent property tax hike that comes along with the budget presented to council a few weeks ago. Admittedly, that’s a tough hit for people on fixed incomes seeing as how we’re barely coming out of the worst economic downturn since the soup lines and dust bowl era. But if there’s one thing we can all agree on, we’re better being in Guelph than anywhere else, right? Right?

Well I found a conscientious objector on Ian Findlay’s Ward 2 Blog as I was scouring the net looking for Guelph-related political topic material last week. A letter was posted entitled, “What Guelph Really Needs,” and for the most part it was the typical plebiscite about how Guelph doesn’t have enough shopping and how the City is apparently unwilling or unable to do anything about it.

If I sound harsh towards the letter writer and his intentions, that’s only half true. Mining underneath there’s a truth that parts of Guelph look dangerously like bedroom communities, and in general our city needs more balance in its commercial space, but that’s not what got me. It was this, the second line from the letter: “You say we should take BMA’s suggestion and compare ourselves with Barrie – there’s no comparison, nor is there with places like Cambridge, Norval, Halton Hills, and shortly Fergus. We are falling that far behind the times.”

The letter writer’s right, there is no comparison between Guelph and places like Norval and Halton Hills, but he does seem woefully misinformed as to why. Of course, if the writer, who only identified themselves as “BA,” was really informed on the subject he or she would then know that Norval is technically part of Halton Hills and not a community that stands apart from it. Now that I’ve had my snooty moment, let’s look deeper at why BA (Baracus?) is wrong. What makes me know better? Why I’m from Georgetown, of course. DA-DA-DA-DUM!

(Georgetown is the biggest part of Halton Hills, a community of nearly 55,000 made up of Georgetown and surrounding districts like Acton, Stewarttown, Limehouse, Hornby, Glen Williams, and yes, Norval.)

To kick off, let’s start where BA started: transportation. “Massive sections of this city have no grocery store within any type of reasonable area – and these areas do not have bus service,” writes BA. “The closest corner store, also not within walking distance may not have what they require. And, heaven forbid they don’t drive – cab fares are in excess of $30.00 to get them to Guelph’s ONLY 24 hour grocery store.”

BA raises a good point, and it’s a point that would be further solidified if it hadn’t been for the previous mention of Halton Hills. You know what passes for public transportation in Georgetown? The GO Bus that leaves from Guelph for Brampton every three hours and the GO train that leaves Georgetown for Toronto twice a day. And B.A. may complain about four grocery stores being centralized in the south end of Guelph, well there’s only four in the whole of Georgetown. And if you live in the west end of town you’re screwed because all but three of those stores are in the far east end, and the other one is practically in Milton.

So if you’re a senior, a person of limited means or a person with limited mobility, you’re screwed if you want to do a little thing like go grocery shopping or go to Zellers to get a new pair of shoes, you might be out as much as a $30 round trip by taxi, or at least $15 if you don’t mind the 45 minute to an hour walk one way. You would think an area where services are spread so thin (Halton Hills covers 275 square kilometres), would adopt some kind of public transit service, but the truth is they don’t want it. You see, public transit matters most to two types of “undesirable people”: the poor and the immigrants. No one will tell you that to your face, but it’s understood that that’s the reason.

Mobility is a large issue in terms of making sure that we have a vibrant and liveable community, and I think that’s the point that BA is trying to make. However, the answers to Guelph’s problems won’t be found in Halton Hills, and on the surface of it, I’d rather that Guelph did not look like big box havens like the outlining areas of Cambridge. There’s room from improvement, but the backwards slide in making Guelph another bedroom community is a slippery slope.

Romance and Transit Cuts

Union Prez Also Confused By Transit Cuts

Of course, the transit riders of Guelph were not a happy bunch a few weeks ago when news came down that again this summer there will be service cuts and a fare increase, but they weren't the only ones. Indeed, the people driving those buses aren't happy either, and neither are their union reps.

I got the chance to talk to Amalgamated Transit Union (ATU) Local 1189 President Gary Daters on the phone last week and it wasn’t hard to tell that he was slightly disappointed when reading in the newspaper on February 1 that his workers were going to have to take a budget hit for the second year in the row. “We negotiated a contract under the understanding that there would be no service cuts this year," explained Daters. "We ratified the vote on January 30th and the next day we were informed that there would be service cuts. We questioned that, and we were told even last year that it would only be a one time deal.”

Adding to the union's cynicism of the City's intentions is the fact that Daters and other members of union leadership didn't find out about the proposed cuts and fare hike until the day after the new three-year union contract was ratified, the same day that City Council got its first look at the proposed 2011 budget. Daters was called for a meeting with transit's general manager January 31st, but was unable to attend, hence the newspaper revelation the next day.

“Our goal is to keep 20-minute service in the summer time so that the public won’t be inconvenienced and also there won’t be any layoffs on our part," Daters added. "Last year, it was a tough summer. People were missing their transfers and there was a strain on the drivers that were here.”

Last summer, 20-22 workers were laid off from June to August as Guelph Transit’s 20-minute service, and Sunday service for the month of August, were both suspended in an effort to save money in the City’s operating budget. Of those some 22 workers, five did not return in September. Daters says that if the same number of layoffs occur this summer, chances are that the number of workers that won’t return will increase. “I’ve talked to many who were laid off last year already and they’ve said that this time, if there’s another layoff, [then they won't come back] because they can’t afford to work nine months of the year,” he said.

In the hope to build support for transit and to hopefully overturn the decision to cut service and increase fares, the ATU Local is asking for public support. Additionally, the ATU is putting together a presentation for the February 22nd council meeting and Daters says that he's been in communication with other local groups making presentations to City Council during their deliberations. Daters is asking transit users to make their displeasure heard with their City Councillors.

How Romantic…?

A couple of years ago, I was on the crew for a film shooting in and around Guelph called Four Aces. It was a romantic comedy, set in Guelph, about people that lived in Guelph, made by a crew mostly from Guelph, living in Guelph, or spent some time in Guelph. Clearly, we were on to something because just in time for Valentine’s Day, Guelph was named the second most romantic city in Canada for the second year in a year. It’s a vindication only Two-Face could appreciate, but still, it’s nice to think that little Ole Guelph – The Royal City – is also The Romance City (at least in Ontario).

So by what standard are we the second most romantic, or the most romantic in Ontario to put it another way? Was it the cozy atmosphere of our eateries? The charming vistas along the paths of our local parks? Activities that foster romantic connections like Guelph Jazz Festival or Hillside? Nope. Let’s quote the story from the 570 News website: “Amazon.ca bestowed that honour on the Royal City based on the per capita sales of romance novels, relationship books, romantic comedy DVD's and Michael Buble CD's since January 1, 2011.”

That’s great. We’re romantic because of the number of books with beefcake emblazoned covers and CDs with Rat Pack cover songs sold? Does anyone else feel cheated? You should because as the 570 News story pointed out, one could see these stats another way as they indicate that there may be a great number of lonely people in Guelph; hence their investment in items of fictional romance. And did you notice that mention of “relationship books?” Are you likely to have a lot of romance if you’re hitting the books trying to figure out why your relationship isn’t firing on all cylinders?

Anyway, Happy Belated Valentine’s Day, I guess.

Budget, Snow Days and Baseball

There Will Be Budget

Opening arguments were made for the 2011 capital and operating budgets last Monday night at City Council. First the good news: revenues are bouncing back and signs point to a recovery in the local economy following the last, great worldwide recession. Because of that, the City’s looking to loosen the purse strings and get hiring. Additionally, there will be no five-day layoffs or shutdowns in 2011, with the City of Guelph being open all 52 weeks this year. Most of the new hiring has to do with the plethora of new city facilities coming on line this year – the transit hub, Market Square, the new Civic Museum and Organic Waste Plant. Additionally, there are new city facilities that were opened in 2010, that will now have to be covered for a full year of operating expenses.

But you can’t have good news without some bad news, and though a lot of the pre-recession spending was returned, not all of it was. There’ll be no 20-minute service for Guelph Transit this summer, and indeed, there may even be a cash fare increase of 10 cents, which could be integrated as early as May. But Transit may not be the only fee increase coming to a city service near you in 2011; parking fees in particular will increase with the additional revenue being put towards transit. As for the number we’ve all been waiting for, the bump in the property tax, which will see an increase by 5.67 per cent. City Staff wanted to make particular note that they were trying to balance sustainability and affordability in going in to this year’s budget.

To learn more about this year’s budget and to follow the process along in the coming month, go to my blog at http://guelphpolitico.blogspot.com/

In Reverse

Was everybody else underwhelmed by the “snow-pocalypse” that hit us last week? Certainly, there were a lot of people unpleased initially by the sheer tonnage of snow being forecast, and then later by the fact that we only got a percentage of what was promised. Apparently, there’s no pleasing some people. Too much snow, not enough snow, and on top it, the whole thing went down on Groundhog Day. Cosmic coincidence, or was Mother Nature flipping us the bird for all the whining despite the fact that this was the worst winter storm to hit us in over two years?

But out of that contradiction came an even more interesting phenomenon. For only when the weather threatens to make the Hoth system look like a tropical vacation does the University of Guelph pre-emptively shut its doors. To all our U of G readers, I hope you enjoyed your snow day, because God knows there’s a better chance of a rich man passing through the eye of a needle than the administration of the University deciding to put the kibosh on a day of classes. I went to school at the U of G for four years and worked there for another three, and I can count on one hand the number of times that place was closed. It’s not often that the phrase “Once in a Blue Moon” gets taken so literally.

No Joy in Royal City Ville

The outlook wasn't brilliant for Guelph baseball fans last Wednesday; time had run out and the City’s Intercounty Baseball League team, The Royals, had no more innings to play. The last hope for a lease at Hastings Stadium died first, and the patience of the IBL did the same. A sickly silence fell upon the patrons of the game. It was a silence that seemed to extend to Royal’s president and managing partner Jim Rooney, who emailed a short news release last Wednesday afternoon to the Guelph Mercury. It said that his team “has not reached an agreement for a long-term lease agreement with the City of Guelph. As a result, the Team will ask the IBL to suspend operations for the 2011 season.”

Big deal, you may scoff, it’s just small town baseball. Well the situation is this: The Royals are one of the IBL’s founding members, now benched for the 2011 season. The difficulty isn’t just in the fact that an agreement on the stadium wasn’t quite able to be reached, but because the matter ate additional time needed to shore up the team’s financials for this coming season. The shame of it is that The Royals are a solid team. They’ve made the playoffs the last 11 seasons in a row, won back-to-back championships in 2003 and 2004, and have made it so far as the semi-finals the last three years in a row. Strange that this winning team shall be forced to stay home for a year, while the Blue Jays continue to fumble all the way to the bottom of the standings… C’est la vie.

Build the World of the Dream

With so much talk the last few weeks about potential construction projects that can radically change the atmosphere of the City of Guelph, perhaps a little waxing and waning about nostalgia and the Royal City’s yesteryears was inevitable. As with all government projects, it never takes long for a strong vocal opposition to make its presence felt, as it was in the case of the proposed student high rises at Gordon and Stone, and now the proposed condominium at Woolwich and Macdonell.

The thing that gets me is with these issues is how people want to have their cake and eat it to. People want lower taxes, but the same (if not expanded) level of service. They want state of the art infrastructure and roads, but complain about the construction that makes it so. They hate having students spread out across the City and having a (perceived?) negative impact on their neighbourhoods, but they also don’t want them in all together in one place if it means building a tower.

These dualities are inherent in human nature. We want to park where we want despite the rules, yet see others punished by them. We want to eat junk food and stay paper thin. We want the exaltation of beating the latest Zelda game, but do so by looking up cheats online. We want a world of improbabilities, but reality has some strict rule about cause and effect. But what if it didn’t? What if you could build the Guelph of you dreams?

BRRRRRRRAAAAAWWWWRWRRRMRMRMMRMRMMMMM!!!

I have conflicting moments myself. I’ve made no secret of the fact that I love the construction-in-progress inter-module transit hub. However, in the process of seeing the darn thing constructed, a couple of the added value items had to be tabled. Items like heated bus shelters and additional public washrooms had to be put on the “We’ll get to those later” list, and though that wasn’t the greatest news, it wasn’t really a deal breaker for me to not support the project. Really, I was more disappointed with the fact that the hub will close the pedestrian tunnel behind the current Greyhound terminal. There’s such wonderful graffiti down there.

As I recently noted on my blog, Guelph Politico, if I could conjure a change to Guelph, it would be to establish another movie theatre. Honestly, it need not be a state-of-the-art monstrosity of seizure-inducing lights and sounds, I’ll take a second run house like the old Three Star, where the popcorn flowed cheap and admission prices more inline with the quality of the Hollywood hogwash on its six screens. And I would get to this theatre by street car, which did actually operate in the Guelph of olden times. Sure, a recent survey conducted by a consultant said that Guelph’s streets were too skinny for light rail, but this is Inception world and I can widen the streets on a whim.

Other dreams, however, are less fanciful and have an actual shot at becoming reality. I refer to Guelph’s bid to become Canada’s Hockeyville. The contest put on by Kraft and the CBC, which closed last Sunday, invited Canadian residents to tell stories and send pictures about their local arena and prove why your community should be deemed “Hockeyville.” The prize is $100,000 in upgrades for the arena, a NHL pre-season game and a visit from Hockey Night in Canada. I’ll admit that last part got me excited because I have a lemon meringue ready for Don Cherry’s face after that “pinko-commie” bike rider comment at Rob Ford’s inauguration.

But aside from my own life goals, Guelph has responded with aplomb to the notion of being named Hockeyville. The amount of stories and photos provided about the arena in Exhibition Park put Guelph in the Top 3 cities in Ontario in terms of responses. (Guelph’s dedication certainly exceeded that of my hometown of Georgetown, which had a total of one story and one photo in support of its local arena.)

Could Guelph have done better though? Certainly an editorial writer in the Guelph Mercury thought so, and they were wondering where exactly the rookie Ward 2 Councillor, former NHL officiator Andy Van Hellemond, was with his vocal, public and sun eclipsing support for making his town Hockeyville. “We suspect Van Hellemond may be wary of jumping on this bandwagon because it could see him regarded anew as the ex-NHLer and not as a councillor with many interests,” said the editorial published on January 11^th. “If that’s the case, don’t sweat such worries councillor. You’ll take a bigger political beating over sitting this one out than by jumping in.”

Call me kooky, but do you think that being a part of City Council for a little more than a month and looking down the maw of pressing issues concerning city development and finances might have Van Hellemond’s head in bigger places than getting Guelph a fake honorific. Besides, Van Hellemond was born in Winnipeg, so I’d wager that he doesn’t have a lot of childhood memories of skating at Exhibition Park, which is the point of this thing anyway.

And I may be dreaming, but considering that Guelph is the Royal City, isn’t winning the title of “Hockeyville” a little like the King of England abdicating and running for Mayor of Leeds. Just sayin’.

BRRRRRRRAAAAAWWWWRWRRRMRMRMMRMRMMMMM!!!